Today I have spent the better part of the day reflecting, reflecting on my family, my friends, my unconditional love for my children, my deep love for my husband (my soul mate and best friend), reflecting on nature, relationships, on stillness… on quiet…. and on connections.
As I slowed my mind down, attempting to transcend the clutter of my racing thoughts, I realized how beautiful the friendships I have are, and how we all must disconnect in order to fully connect with others. Disconnect the cell phones, the emails, the screens and all the other daily inputs consuming our focus and thoughts.
Today I stood outside in the wilderness of Vermont, alone, and listened to the stillness. At first I only heard quiet…but as my mind adjusted to this slower rhythm I started to hear the cadence and patter of the snow falling off the trees from last night’s dusting, the rustle of leaves in the soft breeze, a far off call of a bird. I took many deep breaths and filled my lungs with the cold, crisp air and closed my eyes. I felt joy in being alive.
Life goes by in the blink of an eye. Our busy lives and full schedules make it slip by even faster. It’s too short to not slow down and find connections. Connect with nature. Connect with your children. Connect with your family. Connect as a family. There is a difference there.
Connect with yourself. Think about what makes you happy. What fills you with excitement and passion. What do you like? Spend less time worrying and more time being grateful for those who love you and all of life’s goodness. Look at what is right in front of you with fresh eyes as if you are seeing them for the first time.
So again…get off the devices. Slow down and look your children, friends, loved ones in the eye and listen. Ask them how their day was and really listen. Nothing is more important and precious in life than loving and being loved. Without connections life is hollow, lonely and empty. Don’t waste what you have. Choose to be happy, to be at peace. If you look for the good, you’ll find it.
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
We are inherently social beings. Our lives are shaped by our ability to cooperate and coexist with those around us. The power of community is our greatest saving grace in the face of meaninglessness and destruction. I have no words for the horrific events that took place in Las Vegas this week. My heart aches for the victims and their families. With this post, I want to focus on communities and events that bring us together. For society to renew, individuals must constantly focus on self-renewal.
Self-renewal requires you to cultivate your capacity for renewal by doing new and different things. We can too easily become complacent with our lives and settle into a rigid structure of sameness.
As we mature we progressively narrow the scope and variety of our lives. Of all the interests we might pursue, we settle on a few. Of all the people with whom we might associate, we select a small number. We become caught in a web of fixed relationships. We develop set ways of doing things.
Doing new things shakes us out of our apathy. This is why when you travel you regain an attentiveness that heightens every experience. Use your weekends to explore and engage and try new things…even if you feel like staying home. Push yourself. It’s worth it. In the warmer months seek out things like carnivals, antique car shows and, yes, chili cook offs.
This summer my kids pushed me to go to the En Ka Street Fair in Winchester, MA. I was at first resistant but I am so glad we went. There was something thrilling in being one amongst the crowd, everyone just relaxing and having fun.
Traveling carnivals are fun to explore and are a good example of temporal experiences set up to bring people together. The Chicago World’s Fair in 1893 was the catalyst for traveling carnivals, rides, food (maybe not fried dough back then…), games of chance, thrills and more.
Every May in Sandpoint, ID there is a Lost in 50’s Car Show and Street Party. This past May was their 32nd annual event, which is impressive in and of itself. Krister, my love, attended and took these luscious photos. The downtown streets were lined with beautiful vintage cars, musical acts, street dances and more.
People bring their antique cars from far and wide, even Canada, to participate. You can feel the sense of pride in sharing their restorations, which sparks many conversations.
In June, stretched out across City Beach in Sandpoint, ID with a back drop of blue skies, big mountains and boats on Lake Pend Oreille, cooks from across the region set up their tents and chili with the hope of taking home the top prizes for their recipes and a chance to compete for the World Chili Cookoff in Nevada. (Who knew there was such a thing?) The community comes together for tasty chili while enjoying the camaraderie and competition.
I have a robust commitment to hope. Happiness is not something we find. It’s something we make. We need each other. Friendship and love dissolve misunderstanding, force fresh perspectives, alter judgements and break down barriers. Explore, try new things, connect with people. Be open to loving and being loved. Magic is something you make.
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
To be human is to know pain. During times of loss and personal crisis, we are thrown into chaos and can often tumble into despair, misery, bitterness, anger and angst. Whether it be physical or emotional pain, we all have dark hours. In those darkest hours, it feels like you are so completely alone and you lose hope. I know, I’ve been there. Yet to be human is also to be resilient. We do heal. Things get better. It just takes time. Albert Camus asserted that “there is no love of life without despair of life.”
Everyone has his or her own path for grieving, for mending…for coping. For those I know hurting now, try to slow down and find solace in quiet moments, simple things. Focus on the senses. The way a breeze feels on your skin. The taste of a treat. The texture of a fabric. A soft touch. Smell. Breathe. Taste. Just be. Staying present and intimate with the moment, requires mastering maitri, the Buddhist practice of loving-kindness toward oneself, that most difficult art of self-compassion.
When my brother Robbie passed away in 2001, it was a horrifically dark time. In my attempt at trying to find order, to cope, I chose to paint a portrait of him, painted from a small wallet-sized senior high school photo of his. I still have it today, it’s scratched and worn, but Robbie’s spirit shines through.
I painted through my tears. I painted and painted, reworking it over and over. My intention was to paint a portrait of my brother for my father as a gift, to help him heal. I spent many months with the painting. I realized much later that my colors were skewed. His vibrancy does not come through. I think my sadness shrouds the painting still.
Robbie’s birthday was July 29. He is always with me but these last few weeks even more so. I honor him with this post. This entire blog is a tribute to him. I miss him every day. His passion and zeal for life and adventure touched so many.
The day after he died in March 2001 his close friend wrote a poem for him. I close now by sharing it with you here.
Jilted To Robbie, March 23, 2001
I loved a man who danced with Life;
He’d twirl her in his arms
Until she dropped exhaustedly-
Too heavy with his charms.
I used to look on jealously,
And wonder if he knew
How quickly I’d replace her
If he’d only ask me to,
Because I feel I wouldn’t tire,
But last into the night.
I’d take his turns and twists and dips
With all my strength and might.
We’d cha-cha, tango, maquerena
Till the dawn broke in,
And once we thought we’d had enough,
We’d jitterbug again.
Unconstant Life, you drew him in
Until you recognized
How much he needed loving you,
How much of you he prized.
So whimsically you threw him off,
Refusing one more dance
To one with whom I’d dance forever
Given half a chance.
Love, Kathryn Dunnington
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
Ever since I can remember I’ve dreamed about being a writer. Over the years, visions danced in my head of creating novels, poems and short stories. Yet, somehow something inside me always stopped me from taking that first step – even though I know I have much to say and write about – and I thought I’ll get to that later.
I love to read, especially fiction, getting lost inside a good story. This is from where my inspiration for writing comes. One of my favorite books has always been Catcher in the Rye, and to this very day my well worn copy still sits next to my bedside table, filled with underlined passages, notes and dog-eared pages, as I relished every moment at each read. With this inspiration in mind, I’ve decided to start writing now and share my stories here. I welcome contributions from those of you who also want to share your voice. Just contact me!
Below is the first part of a set of serial short stories about a young girl named Sadie. Comments and feedback are welcome.
SADIE – It’s hot
Sadie sat and stared up through the branches looking at the faded blue sky peeking through patchy white clouds. She heard a fly buzzing somewhere behind her. Flicking a twig off her leg, she slid down a little farther into the barrel of water. It was hot. So incredibly hot. She thought she would melt. This is why she filled the metal barrel with water from the hose and plopped down in it. The water felt cool on her hot skin. Even so, sweat dripped from her limbs that didn’t fit in the barrel and the heat was suffocating. The tree gave her a little bit of shade.
She could hear her grandmother in the kitchen chopping vegetables, prepping for tonight’s dinner. Her brother was down by the docks, trying to catch a crab. He’d been at it for a while and was not interested in entertaining Sadie, he said. Caleb was four years older and not much fun; he never wanted to play. Sadie and Caleb had been at their grandmother’s house for a month and a half. Their mother needed a break they were told. She was weak and couldn’t handle their noise and demands. What did they know? Sadie could’ve helped her mom even if she was only eight. She knew how to make sandwiches and clean up the kitchen and she took real good care of her mama. Still, they were sent away.
“Sadie!” she heard her grandmother yell. “What are you doing now? Look at that mess you’ve made!”
“It’s hot,” she yelled back. “What did you expect me to do?” she muttered. Sadie looked at the mud puddle around the barrel and the sludge that was slipping down the hill towards the back door to the kitchen. She had left the hose running so that the water would stay cool. Her feet were covered in mud and it was smudged on her hands and legs, drying and cracking in the heat. Her threadbare yellow dress floated up around her in the barrel and she pushed it back down into the dirty water.
Humming now, she closed her eyes and tilted her head up towards the sky. One hand swirled the water and lapped it up towards her neck. She was trying to remember as far back as she could when her mama was not sick. As hard as she tried, she couldn’t. She wondered what her mama was doing at that moment. A sadness enveloped her. She longed for her mama’s arms and warm embrace and happier days.
Last year, try as she did, she couldn’t stay out of trouble. She was real helpful and always trying to fix things. She had good ideas – she knew that for sure. Didn’t matter that not everyone understood them, like the time she collected the neighbors’ cats and brought them home to the apartment. She thought the cats would be thirsty in the heat. She found three but didn’t know they wouldn’t get along – that it would be hard to get them out before mama got home from work. What a mess that was.
Her mama had been so mad she locked her in the closet for hours and said she couldn’t control her so that’s where she needed to be. She said Sadie gave her a headache. The dark had scared Sadie at first, but then she realized it was nice and peaceful. She could see her mama’s shadows on the floor where the light shown in under the door. Sadie loved those shadows, her mama dancing by every time she passed the door. They comforted her while she softly hummed and rocked back and forth in the dark.
A bird screeched and pulled Sadie back to her barrel of water and the heat. The water from the hose kept rushing down the hill and the mud puddle was getting bigger. She thought she should probably get up and turn off the hose, but the heat made her feel heavy. She didn’t feel like it. She’d get to it before her grandmother looked outside again.
As her eyes scanned the yard, she caught a glimpse of something small and purple across the stretch of patchy grass and gray hardened dirt. She wondered what it could be so she pushed herself up out of the barrel, leaving the dirty water and deluge behind her, forgetting to turn off the hose. She made her way over, tripping ever so slightly on a tree root, to see what caught her eye. As she approached she realized it was a small, blooming violet.
She lay down on her stomach to look closer. The violet had only one flower on a drooping stem with two small yellowish leaves. Popping up out of a crack in the dirt and leaning over, the flower was straining to grow, and yet despite the conditions unsuitable for it to survive, it was still growing with determination. “Look at you, so pretty and small. Where is your mama to take care of you?” she asked in a quiet whisper.
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
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As the school closings started to come in this afternoon because of the impending blizzard, my 12 year old daughter texted me at work to say there would be no school tomorrow so could I please pick up a few things up from the store. For those of you that know her, you won’t be surprised by her forward thinking. For those of you who do not, she is fastidious, loves to plan, likes things to be orderly, and is often a worrier.
Her list made me smile in its simplicity and intent: hot chocolate, marshmallows and waffles. I knew at that moment she was picturing our snow day, with the white snow billowing outside in the frosty wind and with us warm inside, sipping cocoa and munching on waffles. Her perfect snow day.
With this in mind, I thought it might be fun to post a few suggestions on things you can do on a snow day.
Build a snow man, of course
Bake cupcakes, muffins or cookies and enjoy with a cup of hot cocoa
Pull out your art supplies, pens, pencils, paper, scissors and glue. See what happens.
Play a board game like monopoly or maybe a game of charades
Shovel snow – don’t forget to help your neighbors who cannot shovel
How do you like to spend your snow days? Leave a comment below and please share.
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
Sometimes something small grabs your attention during your morning routine that makes you pause. While sipping my coffee and perusing theSkimm in my inbox, the quote of the day caught my attention:
“The fishes loved receiving this anonymous postcard from a fan!” – A California aquarium on some fan mail it received – and apparently read aloud to its exotic fish. The fish flipped.
I clicked the link for further details on what this could mean. So happy I did. A photo is below. Someone took time to write out a postcard for the fish and the aquarium staff read it to them. In case you cannot read it below it says:
Dear fish, You are the best fish ever! Some fish are thought to be scary But you are great!
I love, love this. Passion at its best in a simple form. So to all of you, have a great day. Some of you are thought to be scary, but I think you’re great!
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
This past week I’ve been noticing beauty in many things from the mundane to fabulous, from the specific, faded color of blue on a shed to snow-covered ghost trees on the mountain, and fireworks over the ski village at night. There was a chihuahua named Princess dressed in pink sitting in front of us on the plane – cool? Maybe… She was better behaved than some.
This got me thinking about things that inspire in general. I thought I’d pull together some cool shiz from this week and beyond. Enjoy.
Tiny Ceramics
On a plane a few weeks ago in the American Way magazine on American Airlines, I read a short piece on Jon Almeda’s tiny pottery. I was intrigued and checked out his site. They are gorgeous. I love anything in miniature. Here are a few images from his instagram page, which I love – tiny, beautiful pottery inside fruit!
2. Snow Ghost
I had never heard of Snow Ghost trees before my love used that moniker when we were atop a ski mountain in Idaho in January. The sheer beauty coupled with the name has left a haunting impression on me. They are quiet, with grace and beauty. I could look at them all day. Apparently they are covered in heavy accretions of ice, called rime, instead of snow.
3. Blackbird Doughnuts
Doughnuts. Who doesn’t love a doughnut? Have you tried a gourmet one? Boston has Blackbird Doughnuts, which creates unique gourmet doughnuts and uses brioche dough for their raised doughnuts and old fashioned recipes for their cake doughnuts. Is your mouth watering yet? Here are a few images taken from their instagram page. Shiz is getting real.
4. Fireworks on a Ski Mountain
I believe I have only ever really seen fireworks annually on July 4th or at least in warmer months. This week during our February break from school we got to see these lovely fireworks over the ski village at Schweitzer as the snow came down. It was magical. I took a little video so you can see them too, complete with snow ghost trees in the background.
5. Princess
I will close with pictures of Princess, of course. When I asked what her name is, her lovely Russian owner said Princess in a low sultry voice, barely acknowledging me or making eye contact, which was pretty cool too. Princess remained aloof.
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
Tina Turner asked “What’s Love Got to Do with it?” Well, pretty much everything. In honor of this Valentine’s Day week, yes I made that up, I thought it important to reflect on love in our lives. Every day – not just one day of the year. There are many forms of love. The deep, soul-stirring love for your soul mate, best friend and lover (which I am happily blessed with) to the profound love for your children, love for family, friends, and colleagues. Exchanging kindness, even with strangers, is a form of love. Every person deserves love and wants to be loved and wanted.
Many people do not know the root of Valentine’s Day, some even think Hallmark made it up. I won’t give a history lesson here but the root of it stemmed with an ancient roman pagan festival and grew into a Christian feast day, dubbed St. Valentine’s Day, in honor of a St. Valentine. It was in the 14th century that this day became associated with love.
Ironically it was Esther A. Howland, a female entrepreneur from Worcester, MA, who first started mass producing cards for Valentine’s Day in the 1850’s at the young age of 19. I think that is noteworthy and pretty cool. Prior to this handmade cards with ribbons and lace were popular. Today I prefer handmade anything, but especially a valentine.
Putting aside the present day commercial face of Valentine’s Day, I think it serves as a reminder and opportunity to truly focus on love in its many forms. Sometimes it’s hard to show your feelings or to move past small irritations and to let your loving feelings rise up. Try. We all have people in our families who make it hard. I have dreamed of sending certain family members this book:
I challenge everyone to focus on love. Make sure it’s genuine, heartfelt and full of meaning. Seriously, slow down and hold your loved ones a little closer today, stop and really listen to what people are saying. This is what life is about. Connecting with others, feeling loved and letting others know we care. It really isn’t about racing to your next meeting or the next big thing and thinking how great tomorrow will be. Make each moment count and make today great. Make an effort to love more, and as your relationships deepen, your life will expand. Love is a selfless investment in others with great returns for yourself. I promise.
So, won’t you be my Valentine?
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
As the snow continues to fall over Boston, covering us in its soft, white blanket, I cannot help but also think of snow-covered Idaho. Last year, after 28 years, I found my first love again living in Idaho. Prior to this, I had no concept of the natural beauty of the state.
According to this site, Idaho is the 17th most beautiful state in the United States. Now that I have my own private relationship with Idaho, I am continually stunned with every visit as the Gem State shows me its many jewels.
Northern Idaho’s sheer beauty can be startling and take your breath away. Snow-capped mountains, gorgeous lakes, quiet walks in the woods with towering trees all around and more. Enjoy the tranquility of these caught moments. I sure did.
And a few poems by Robert Frost of course…
Desert Places
Snow falling and night falling fast, oh, fast
In a field I looked into going past,
And the ground almost covered smooth in snow,
But a few weeds and stubble showing last.
The woods around it have it – it is theirs.
All animals are smothered in their lairs.
I am too absent-spirited to count;
The loneliness includes me unawares.
And lonely as it is, that loneliness
Will be more lonely ere it will be less –
A blanker whiteness of benighted snow
WIth no expression, nothing to express.
They cannot scare me with their empty spaces
Between stars – on stars where no human race is.
I have it in me so much nearer home
To scare myself with my own desert places.
Robert Frost
Dust of Snow
The way a crow
Shook down on me
The dust of snow
From a hemlock tree
Has given my heart
A change of mood
And saved some part
Of a day I had rued.
Robert Frost
Carrie Allen created this site as a way for people to share stories about things they love. Read more about her inspiration here.
In the summer of 2016, not long after I started my new adventure working for the Cambridge Innovation Center, I headed off to Japan with my colleagues Tim (Founder and CEO) and Makiko for two weeks in Tokyo, with the intention of expanding our work there.
I arrived in Tokyo on July 30th. Tokyo is fabulous. I loved it, truly, even though Tokyo is the world’s largest megacity with a population of 38.8 million people. I kept thinking about Sofia Coppola’s film Lost in Translation.
After a week in Tokyo, I was ready for something completely different. I felt a bit overwhelmed, unsettled and a bit closed in. I needed to set off somewhere for a few days that would help to ground me, give me the space I craved, and to experience something new.
I decided I would head to Kyoto, taking Shinkansen, the fast train. I would stay at a Buddhist temple for the weekend and take a Zen meditation class. I was nervous, truly nervous, but often fling myself head first into whatever is in front of me, not letting my trepidation hold me back. Emotions are complicated.
I was hopeful that with the Buddhist meditation class I would somehow journey inside, find quiet and my inner voice, maybe even something ancient and holy within me.
Upon arriving outside Kyoto I noticed that it was Quiet. So much quiet… peacefulness. Beauty. Bliss. The opposite of the hustling traffic and people of Tokyo. Even though the website had warned to not use google maps for the 10 minute walk to the temple, I did.
As I wound my way through tiny crooked streets, smaller alleys and a miniature walkway through a backyard, I realized I was trailing another woman following the same, odd, circuitous route. I thought, surely she was headed to the temple too, and clearly followed directions as well as I do. We smiled at each other and confirmed we were on the same path.
As it turns out, Liz had the same idea to spend a weekend in Kyoto at the temple and take the meditation class. Liz (an American) had been living in Tokyo with her husband, who is in the military, for a year and a half.
Google maps took us to a location that was confusing and guided us to a door. Everything was so quiet, we stared at the door, the door stared back at us … it was locked and had no signage.
After a few minutes, a monk came out. Excitedly we let him know we were here for the weekend and class. He didn’t seem to understand. After some confusion and back and forth, he helped us understand, with hand signals and limited words exchanged, we’d come to the wrong temple, but as luck would have it we were not far off. We were in a big temple complex.
We checked in and were assigned our rooms. I decided to venture out to a restaurant called the Wonder Cafe for dinner. I saw Liz on the road and asked her if she wanted to join me. She declined, she was running off to catch a bus to an outside market 40 minutes away, even further into the countryside. How brave, I thought.
The next morning, I was up early and ready for the meditation class. We lined up sitting, facing the garden.
The monk first taught us about mediation and the importance of meditating every day for at least 5 minutes. He said the only thing that is unchanging is change itself. Impermanence, everything changes. We must embrace that and not dwell on the past or fret about what could happen in the future. The outside world cannot impact our happiness. Focus, breath and let change happen. We must quiet our minds, stay positive and focus on our breathing. This helps with metacognition, which also helps with our emotional intelligence.
After the meditation class we had thick matcha green tea and biscuits as a way of prolonging our calm spiritual meditation.
After the tea ceremony and class, Liz and I reconnected, as that morning we had decided we would leave the compound to explore Kyoto for the rest of the day. Liz said she had met Natasja, another traveler from Denmark, after class and she would be joining us.
As I often do, I had played out in my mind exactly how the weekend would unfold. I pictured mediation, and a calmness and quietness enveloping me. I got that from the class that morning for sure; however, the unexpected surprise was in venturing out with two new friends to uncover what secrets Kyoto had for us. Three women came together from different walks of life and different corners of the world. We became fast friends.
The day and ensuing fun unfolded in different ways. We ate green tea ice cream, had an amazing lunch, hiked up a mountain, visited with monkeys, walked through a bamboo forest and ended the day at a tiny little restaurant and met new friends there as well. We shared so many laughs, talked about our lives, who we are, where we came from, and about our hopes and dreams.
All this packed into a day.
We enjoyed each other so much that we decided to meet in Tokyo the following week for more fun, which included a sushi conveyor belt restaurant and visit to a karaoke bar. My journey to Kyoto, and within, led me back to Tokyo with fresh eyes and perspective. In Kyoto I learned to open myself up to those around me more freely, to move past nerves of the unknown, and to live in the present.
Eating healthy and serving healthy food to my kids is critically important to me. Yet we all crave sweets from time to time so having recipes made from wholesome ingredients that actually benefit our bodies fills me with joy. My friend Mia gave me Alissa Cohen’s Raw Food for Everyone Cookbook one year for Christmas. It was here that I first stumbled upon chocolate pudding made from avocados. I have adapted the recipe over the years to whatever I have on hand but the main ingredients are simple: avocados, dates (or agave syrup, honey or maple syrup – whatever you have!), plus cacao (or cocoa powder).
Last night I had to be on a work conference call (it’s hard to coordinate meetings with Tokyo) so I asked my 12 year old daughter to make pasta for dinner for her and her brother – you do what you need to do to balance work and life. I set two avocados next to all the ingredients, thinking they would also have avocados with balsamic vinegar on top, a favorite of ours.
When I came down they were eating their pasta but the avocados were untouched. I asked why they were not eating them and my son, who is 11, said “we thought you could make chocolate pudding with them instead.” What a great idea! I topped the avocado chocolate mousse (more of a mousse this time than a pudding) with cashew cream, which balances the deep rich chocolate flavor with a lighter creamy taste.
The recipe is super simple. Here is what I made last night:
Chocolate Avocado Mousse 2 ripe avocados
1/4 cup organic, raw cacao powder (or cocoa powder)
1/4 cup coconut milk
4 dates, soaked in hot water for a few minutes
2 tablespoons honey
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
dash of cinnamon
Blend all ingredients in a food processor until smooth and spoon into bowls. You can put it in the refrigerator to chill for 10-30 minutes. The pudding will develop a skin over top, just like pudding, if it sits for a while. Spoon cashew cream on top before serving.
Cinnamon Vanilla Cashew Cream 1 cup raw unsalted cashews soaked in water for 1-2 hours
1/2 cup water, plus more for a thinner cream
2 tablespoons maple syrup
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
Put all ingredients into a high speed mixer (I use a vitamix) and blend until smooth. Add more water, sweetener and cinnamon according to taste. This will keep in the refrigerator for a few days.
Carrie Allen created this blog as a way to share stories of passion and love, big and small, with those around the world. You can read more about this on the About page!
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